The more I wanted to be 'better' at things, the more I can't seem to get there.

The dishes I swore I was going to stay on top of? Not happening.
The walking the kids to school in the morning thing? Not happening.
Getting through my mother's shit so I can organize and arrange my house? Not Happening.
The decluttering and reorganizing my house? Takeawildguess.
The going to the gym? HA!! HAHAHA!!

Shoot me now.

I'm at an all time low. It's all I can do to be awake. I spend more time in bed than not. I'm exhausted. I'm depressed. I'm annoyed. This weather is sucking the life right out of me. Is it SAD already, or do I just suck?

The roof is slowly, ever so slowly, being worked on. So far we haven't seen any existence of them replacing the plywood on the roof, but I hope (all fingers and toes crossed) that they aren't replacing them because the wood is still good, or that they haven't gotten that far yet. They started this morning before 8am. Ugh. I'm hoping that either Hubs or I can be home when they work on the front of the house, because I want to make DAMN sure that dormer comes off. It's started raining today so I don't know if they're working through it or what.

I am disappointed to find out that Slayer frontman Tom Araya has to have back surgery so the Canadian Carnage tour is currently postponed, possibly until the New Year. Yikes!! That sucks, but I hope he is okay and recovers quickly. :( Boo to no concert in a week and a half :(

That still leaves me looking forward to Stone Temple Pilots on the 19th, and Three Days Grace on December 15th. In the meantime I will continue to rock out to Five Finger Death Punch!! Hoorah!!
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Now playing: Five Finger Death Punch - Bulletproof
via FoxyTunes   

H1N1 is a real fear. But how much of the information is unbiased and factual, vs. hype and hysteria? Every single sniffle, sneeze or cough is being questioned. I understand the fear, I feel it beating its black wings in my chest. I read about families losing their young, healthy children and I want to scream and cry with them. I want to build a bubble around our family to keep them safe. But that's unrealistic.

It's a short side step from informed and safe, to psychotic and paranoid.

Punkin is now sick, again. Again with the plugged sinuses and sore throat, and raspy cough. No fever. That's where my fear lies, in the fever. It's the sudden high-spiking fever that seems to doom people to this H1N1 monster. I've kept both kids home from school for two days and will probably keep them tomorrow as well, ride out the weekend. I double-checked with the eye doctor that they were okay for me to bring her in. Emphasizing that she is not running a fever and just experiencing sinus symptoms, they said to bring her np. If it weren't for this flu going around, I wouldn't think twice about taking her. Now every step is second-guessed.

Hubs and I still aren't completely over the last round of illness Punkin brought home. We feel a million times better, but neither one of us feels like we are completely recovered. Now we're wondering if we've caught what Punkin brought home THIS time, or are relapsing. I hope that we're all in the clear in time to get the vaccine for both the flu and the H1N1. Right now the vaccine clinics are only for high-risk people and we don't fall into that category.

One day at a time, it's all we can do. I bought hand sanitizer this morning and will continue to keep an eye on the kids.

We had the Halloween Party and concert this past weekend. The party was fun! I got invited to another party tomorrow. We also get to dress up at work but I can't actually wear most of my costume, so I dunno. I hope the kids are good enough to at least go out trick or treating.

The concert was awesome. I will never have to see Gwar again, as long as I live. Once was enough. They are seriously fucked up. Their costumes consisted of thongs, boots and shoulderpads. Oh and masks. Basically. Pot-bellied old men with most of their shit hanging out. Bleh. I'm also very glad we got seats, cause everyone on the floor got covered in red goo. Yuck. The lead singer had a large prosthetic dick and 'blood' squirted out of it. *shakes head* I think most of us sat there in mild shock and bewilderment. It was so ridiculous it was funny.

Job for a Cowboy didn't show, so that was good. It left Lamb of God more time to play more music! Huzzah!! They were fucking awesome. My ears were still ringing two days after the concert. The mosh pit was absolutely insane. Again, thankful for seats instead of standing room. There's no way I would have survived the mosh pit at all. Next concert is Slayer and Megadeth in two weeks. So excited. I have to double-check that I have the dates booked off at work (for that day and hopefully the day after). We're so shortstaffed that I'm getting scheduled to work the days I have booked off and that SUCKS.

I've been playing phone tag with someone interested in the bird for like two weeks now. I'm getting frustrated and the bird is seriously causing me constant frustration. Not by any fault of it's own, but just by my own desire to have it rehomed. Our cat is pissing me the hell off as well. Now that the other cat is outside, Max has decided he needs to be ten times more verbal. Especially at night when we're all sleeping (or trying, obviously).

These kids better get better soon. Having them home and listening to them bicker is driving me mental. Punkin is on Hubs' computer and is trying to fry my nerves by playing music while I'M playing music. She doesn't want to spar with me, honestly. LOL!
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Now playing: Five Finger Death Punch - Hard To See
via FoxyTunes   

I'm cruising along. I am dealing with life the best I can right now. I'm at the tail-end of this fucking cold. I can't seem to kick the annoying cough and sudden frog-in-the-throat thing. Hubs is entering the same stage now. We both have headaches every morning when we wake up. The change in the barometer isn't helping. Last week it snowed, yesterday it went up to 16C. Jeebus.

I worked days all weekend. Saturday I got to go with K and see her baby via 3D/4D ultrasound. I'll admit, I found it quite creepy. I expected more full-body real-time viewing. The technician spent a lot of time cropping out the face and rotating the computer-generated image around. Seeing a partially visible/3D disembodied baby face rotating around a huge tv screen is kinda weird. We got to see the baby yawn though, and THAT was cool. It was confirmed for sure that it was a girl (could clearly see girl-parts). I bought her some baby girl sleepers in celebration :) I also got some sleepers for my boss' new baby girl.

We went out for dinner to celebrate K's birthday and it was SO good. K's bf is a really nice guy and I enjoyed spending time with them and E. Wish I could have stayed later, but I had to work at 6am on Sunday so they took me home at 10pm. I had Monday off, where we discovered that our course textbooks are back-ordered, and we NEED them in order to log into the online course site to DO the work, so we're still waiting. Then I was asked to work day shift Tuesday, and said yes. Ugh.

The shift wasn't bad, I enjoyed working with the day staff (nice change for me), but I'm SO not a morning person. Getting up that early also meant we had to leave Punkin in charge of getting up, getting Dooger up and getting them both ready and off to school. They had no issues, but I felt icky about it. I met Hubs after work and we went up to Wallym*rt to pick up the Transformers 2 movie and new work shoes for him. We finished off Hallowe'en costume preparations/accessories (I'm currently wearing the necklace I got for my costume, I like it that much!). We got the kids each a gift/toy for being well-behaved and responsible. Vegged out and went to bed.

I was supposed to go get some groceries this morning, but I just don't have it in me today. Hubs has been remarking lately that I'm not in a good mood. I'm not playful or good at being teased. I don't know what it is exactly. Although I was getting pains yesterday like I'm going to get my fucking period again. Didn't I *just* have it?? FML. I'm guessing I'm pms'ing right now. Blech.

Getting pumped up for the hallowe'en party this weekend, and Lamb of God on Sunday. Thankfully I switched my shifts so I'm working Saturday days and not working on Sunday. I had a dream that I was absolutely surrounded in laundry, so I think my guilty conscience is working overtime. I shall go sort and fold some laundry :p
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Now playing: Five Finger Death Punch - Hard To See
via FoxyTunes